…zo Maaike – Sonorant
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…zo Maaike

…zo Maaike

Enige tijd geleden vertelde ik u van die geweldige vakantie in Engeland, in zo’n knusse cottage midden in de natuur.

Dat gaat dus niet meer door.

Hier is een korte impressie van mijn laatste gesprek met Mister Matthews, de eigenaar.

Hello, is this Mister Matthews speaking? I’m calling to say that I’m not amused by the messages you left on my answering machine every other day. To say the least. I have already explained a considerable number of times that transferring money via an international bank cheque may take up to six weeks. So it’s no surprise that your money hasn’t arrived yet.


No, I cannot do anything about this, it’s because your country stubbornly refuses to partake in the European Monetary Union. Yes, I know that your cottage is in high demand, and to be honest I’m terribly, terribly disappointed in your lack of trust in me. I have sent you a signed confirmation of our appointment, and as far as I’m concerned, we had a mutual agreement.

*rode sterretjes beginnen langzaam te exploderen voor Maaikes ogen*

I feel really disappointed; actually, I feel you have spoilt our holiday feeling by leaving us with the impression that the cottage is still up for rent to other people. So, I have called my bank just now, and told them to cancel the transaction. I don’t feel I’m capable of enjoying my holiday in the property of someone who is so suspicious of his guests.


You’re sorry? Well, so you should be! You have left us with no holiday. You have basically ruined our plans. You…you…are not a gentleman at all! Goodbye, Mister Matthews.

Jee, wat voelde dat lekker.

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